Thank
you for calling the White House. You have
reached the White House voice mail system. No
one is available to take your call at this time
because the entire administration is out to
lunch. Please follow these instructions
carefully to leave your message. When you are
finished, don't hang up until the FBI finishes
tracing the call. Have a nice day.
If you are male and would like to leave a
message for the president, press 9. If you are
female and would like to leave a message for the
president, press M-O-T-E-L-6.
To leave a message for Mrs. Clinton, press
N-O-W. If you are male and would like to leave a
message for Chelsea, press N-O-W-A-Y.
To leave a message for Buddy, press D-O-G.
To leave a message for Socks, press
D-O-G-F-O-O-D.
To leave a message for Roger Clinton, press A-A.
If you are from Arkansas, ask the next person
who walks by to show you which button has a 2 on
it and then press it.
If you are calling with a question about
affirmative action, press 3 and step to the back
of the phone booth.
If you are calling to arrange a night in the
Lincoln bedroom, press D-O-L-L-A-R.
If you are calling to arrange a White House
coffee, press Y-E-N.
If you are calling leave a message for Janet
Reno, press W-A-C-O.
To leave a message for the president's advisor
on women's rights, press O-J.
To leave a message for Steven Speilberg to give
to Barney Frank, press E-T-P-H-O-N-E-H-O-M-E.
To leave a message for a member of Congress,
press B-I-G-D-O-N-O-T-H-I-N-G.
To leave a message for the Gore2000 campaign,
press H-O-P-E-L-E-S-S.
To speak to an operator, press 0.
To speak to a slick operator, stay on the line
and the president will answer your call shortly.
